Cansellus, "life. absurd." was pleased to announce today that they've opened their community garden, 'Cansellus Farms' to the public.
"We are going to give our residents a sense that everything is a-okay here" remarked Julie, the new activities director.
Growing random mutations of various vegetables, the community garden wishes to convey to residents the by-gone days of white picket fences, and a farm in the backyard.
"Can I eat this?" asked our reporter as he plucked a seventeen pound tomater off its stalk. "Oh dear god, no!" yelled Julie. She continued "Christ, are you insane? This is for photos and making the community feel better about themselves for purchasing, not for eating."
Our reporter unfortunately was famished, and quickly wrapped up the interview to head to our local Wendy's and grab himself a burger, cooked to perfection. Julie called him later on in the day to offer "that tomater could have had pesticides in it, that could have poisoned you!"
Owing to the complexity of the interview, all our reporter was able to inform Julie of was, "that's not a watermelon growing, that's cancer, and I still want that tomater."
We look forward to reporting more on our wonderful garden as soon as both reporter, and activities director calm their mood.
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